More, more DWP. If ever lover were as attentive to me as I to thee, DWP, I would in ecstasy forever be. Double whammy today people. 1) Answerphone message from Belfast confirming my ESA, I should have money by Friday. 2) Capability for Work Questionnaire (ESA 50) on the table waiting for me, dated June 27th.

Now, let us get this clear:

  • June 22nd: I phoned the DWP as I knew they’d received my ESA1 form on June 2nd and I’d heard nothing , was told to send more medical evidence.
  • June 23rd: Got E-mail confirmation of ESA.
  • June 24th:  Got Text message from DWP asking for ‘Fit-Note’ (that had already been sent).
  • June 27th: ESA 50 posted to me by DWP.
  • June 28th: Got medical evidence scanned and sent to DWP
  • June 29th: Got answerphone message confirming I’ve been awarded ESA and that I’m going to be paid. Also received ESA 50 form.

So, can you see something wrong here?- they sent me an e-mail confirming my ESA before requesting more medical info, then sent me the ESA50 form before receiving my medical evidence, and then confirmed my ESA again via answerphone message. This means I suffered anxiety about sending my Medical evidence for no reason – they had sent the ESA 50 form before getting my proof – so the first E-mail I got for them was correct and the Text asking for more evidence was unnecessary. I am glad I sent them the medical evidence  I did, but the order and manner in which the above happened is confusing. Also it caused me great distress – I had a stress nosebleed and terrible Tinnitus as a result. I also didn’t know what to believe – which form of communication was to be trusted.

Today I went back to the Job Centre to collect my medical letters and evidence. Again, there were few staff. The lady I saw Yesterday and to whom I gave my documents was absent. I was told to come back later, which I could not do. I asked if she would be in  tomorrow, but was told she was going to be away and might also be away on Friday – doing training- and there was no one else to help me. I know that the lady in question was not in charge of scanning documents – she told me – but I have to get them back from her. I was very angry and frustrated when I left the JC as was my Dad who had made a special trip to take me to it. And I don’t trust the JC/ DWP with my primary evidence. Nothing is ever easy and it never seems to end. However, I am going to give myself a very short break – a week. If my money comes through I’m going to treat myself – to a new document box. I bought one for my ESA based documentation, but it’s already full. I believe I am going to accrue more paper in the next weeks or months, and I find it easier to have a box to put it in. I also have a back-log of paper – cards, notes etc. from last October-November when I was organising my Mum’s Funeral. I have people who need a response, and who I’ve not been able to give my time as I’ve been too wrapped up in the DWP. I may also treat myself to a new Audiobook. I love history on Audiobook. Audiobooks are incredibly useful to me. Indeed, they are essential to my mental health and well-being – they block Tinnitus and keep my brain occupied when my body is unable to do anything but lie down. They distract from pain – being soothing and informative, like a good lecture. I still buy mine on CD as I don’t have modern technology available. I buy as much as I can second hand via E-Bay or Amazon. This does not just apply to CD’s but most things. Only my underwear and shoes are brand new.

The title of this post is taken from a Pulp B-Side ‘Ansaphone’:


Peg Woffington in bed, suffering from Paralysis. Oil on Canvas, c.1758, Unknown Artist. National Portrait Gallery, London. Copyright belongs to the NPG. Margaret ‘Peg’ Woffington (1720-1760) was a famous Georgian actress. In 1757 she collapsed on stage while playing Rosalind in ‘As You Like It’. From then on she was paralysed and confined to bed. She had been painted many times before – and the above was her final image. It is an unusual portrait not just for it’s subject, but also it’s ‘honesty’. Peg is 38 years old, but her face looks older and communicates a ‘blankness’ – her nothingness or physical silence as an ‘invalid’, just as clearly as it would have communicated her personality as an active actress.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s