Is the name of a product used to home fix your teeth. My Mum always had it lying around to stick her shonky crowns back in when they fell out (which was often) or fill holes in her mouth. DIY dentist that woman. Wednesday I go to hospital to have my first tooth extraction – a ‘Wisdom tooth’ that’s so deeply embedded in my cheek I can’t feel it with my finger: my mouth is actually quite small and my teeth big – I don’t know how they’re going to get the fucker out. And I don’t know how I’m going to react. I’m strangely scared. I’m scared that the noise of the tooth removal echoing ’round my head will drive me mad. I’m noise sensitive and the tooth is on my SSCD side so I’m even more sensitive. Noise has driven me mad before. In 2002 I had such bad Tinnitus I tried to kill myself. So I’m not exaggerating. I lost my mind to sound.

In addition to having 1/4 of my Wisdom removed, I have also lost my voice. So, I’m half deaf, half blind and now, mute. It is not constant, but it has been and it will return. The Dysphonia discovered in January has not reduced, though I am not drinking caffeine, am drinking lots of water and am massaging my throat. This means I will have to see my GP to be referred for speech therapy. Apparently this is an EDS thing, but it could just be a Sarah thing.

To add to the Babel of woes, I’ve had Bronchitis. I don’t go to the GP for these things any more, but as I age I get sicker and sicker from little things. I’ve had an aching head for days, and have been so weary from coughing I’m like a 19th century heroine. I have managed to do things, but not very much. I’ve managed an exhibition that was a bitter disappointment. It took so much effort to get to it, and it let me down. Pah! To hell with art! *limps off swirling a cloak over her hunched shoulder and pressing a silk topper to her head…*

Good news on the Orchid front: after re-potting, nothing negative happened. And then my Dad knocked Orchid 2 (baby ‘chid) over and tried to hide it but I’d noticed, so I had to re-pot it again. I was preparing it’s Requiem when Bang! shit started happening. Orchid 2 has started growing all over. Orchid 1 has done fuck all, even though it was given Orchid food etc. and wasn’t knocked over.

My family is still falling apart: relationships toppling over and sending up dust all over. I am having an emotional blip of quite large size, but I shall fight that once my tooth is out.



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